Coach Rachel Daniel on confidence, standing up to a bullying boss and negative thoughts.
Rachel Daniel is a London-based coach and supervisor, often working in the areas of transitioning to new roles, burnout and resilience. She is a former commercial operations director for FTSE 100 and privately-owned companies, and has been coaching for over ten years.
How familiar are you with your inner bitch (that steely inner core or fiery lioness inside) and where does she come out?
I had one role with a boss who told me that I couldn’t do certain things. In short, she was bulling me. In the end I made the decision to stand up to her. I wasn’t going to work like that. My role was everything she told me I couldn’t do and she was making it impossible for me. Most recently, I was working with a team and one man in particular thought he was “it”. We couldn’t get him to shut up and it wasn’t fair one everyone else. I had to calm him down whilst drawing on my inner strength. That’s when I am probably smiling even more than usual, drawing myself up and taking action with whatever the situation, but I’m feeling strong underneath. I do make myself bigger, taller and I’m more likely to work hard to make something look effortless.
What’s the best confidence advice you’ve ever been given/read/heard?
That whatever you think comes true. If you feel that you are going to slip up it often happens so I try to flip myself out of negative thoughts. I concentrate on the rational rather than letting my emotional side take over.
What time in your life has tested your confidence most and how did you get around it?
When I was fired from my job for being pregnant. This really shook me and even impacted on my confidence going back to work.
What are you confidence/self-esteem wobbles (we all have them?)
In group settings I sometimes find that I can’t articulate what I want to say: the words won’t come. This is usually when I am put on the spot and feeling under pressure.
Who is your confidence role model?
Meghan Markle, she comes across very well.
What’s your own confidence or self-esteem tips for other women?
Positive self-talk and affirmations really do work. Also, start the morning off breathing slowly for 5 to 10 minutes and visualizing a positive day ahead.
You can find Rachel at https://www.racheldaniel.london/